Lucky Conclusion: Tender Mercies

In parting ways with Lucky we really wanted to find him a home. The kids prayed for a good home for Lucky. Katie prayed for a good home for Lucky. I sort of hoped for a good home and kind of prayed but really was sort of cynical about the praying thing assuming for I-don't-know-what-reason that such a prayer wouldn't make a difference anyway and that Lucky would just end up back at the shelter.

I am rebuked in my lack of faith. As Neal A. Maxwell would say, the Great God of the Cosmos is in the details of our lives. Prayer answered.

Katie happened upon a woman willing and wanting to take on another dog in an environment entirely conducive to providing a thriving life for a little terrier such as our Lucky. And we can even visit him from time to time.

I think the kids are awestruck and slightly disappointed (because they will miss Lucky, bites notwithstanding) at the speed with which the prayer was answered.

(Not So) Lucky: A Dog's Story

I climbed a mountain and I turned around. Surely, Stevie Nicks had in mind the circumstance of having to part with a recently adopted dog when she penned these lyrics.

Oh, Lucky, you never really had a fair chance. We're not dog people. I've never had a dog. Katie has not had a dog in decades. So to have our first dog be a one-year old former street fighter was a bit foolhardy in retrospect. We attempted due diligence but simply did not know what we did not know.

We are busy people and we have three kids who behave unpredictably toward the dog. Is it fair to the kids to bring home a long-wished-for pet only to tell them to stay away from him while he learns to be around humans? Is it fair to the dog to punish him for reacting in the only way he knows to what must seem like aggressive provocations from the kids?

He showed enough positive signs that we thought we could train him. He showed this same signs to trusted dog people we consulted. Another bite, however, and the line is drawn. We will part ways with Lucky.

I am disappointed by this. The kids are conflicted to pieces. They understand not liking dogs that bite, but they, like Katie and me, also love the dog. We unwittingly put him in a difficult situation. I believe Katie is also conflicted. Lucky seems to love her the most. But I can't have a dog that is committed to protecting my wife from my kids (i.e. keeping them away from their mother). Somewhere along the way we made some kind of newbie dog owner mistake and he thinks Katie is his and no one else can have her. While no doubt flattering for Katie, this is an untenable arrangement.

We are doing our best to find him a proper home but so far no takers. There is the shelter...Oh, Lucky, I am sincerely very sorry.

Valentine's 2013 Playlist

Time in a Bottle--Jim Croce
Runaways--The Killers
Something to Talk About--Bonnie Raitt
Love You Like a Love Song--Selena Gomez
Brittle Heart--Brett Anderson
Because the Night--10,000 Maniacs
Don't Know Why--Norah Jones
Hero--Enrique Iglesias
Rhythm of Love--Plain White T's
Going to California--Led Zeppelin

My Recent Work in Jordan (Thank You for My Job)

I have income because U.S. taxpayers give up a bit of theirs.  I ponder the moral obligation of this arrangement every day.  Here is a report I helped produce with my little share of your tax dollars:  Review of USAID/Jordan's Cash Transfer Activities.

Happy Family Saturday at the Villa

Firstly (not a word, I know, but it should be), let me explain that I find myself without a true weekend in Cairo and this is the most severe element of culture shock. Thursday is Friday, but Friday is Sunday rather than Saturday. Therefore, we have church Friday morning and thus cannot party Thursday night. Friday, being Sunday, also fails to provide a party night ('cause, you know, the sabbath and the keeping holy and all that). Then Saturday, which remains more or less Saturday, is a work/school night. And I keep thinking Tuesday is Wednesday because it is the third work day and thus I consistently forget about Tuesday evening tasks and/or events.

Secondly (also not a word, but also should be), we try to do fun family things on Saturday. We especially enjoy Wadi Degla, known to Maadi denizens as simply "the wadi," for hiking and cave exploring. We recently added baseball in the back yard of the church building, known to those in the know as "the villa," to our activity list.

So I set off yesterday (Saturday, which is still Saturday), minivan loaded with water bottles, whiffle balls, bat, dog, leash, remote control helicopter, etc. for various anticipated adventures including but not limited to the wadi, the villa, and the commissary (a consumer packaged goods brand manager bonanza).

We decided to try tee ball at the villa for our first stop. The five minute car ride took about fifteen minutes, however, as we frequently stopped for Henry's in-car time outs imposed for infractions including but not limited to hitting, biting, name calling, spitting, and whining. That sentence could be considered foreshadowing.

Once at the villa, the tee ball game was delayed by picking up Lucky's poo (we will not be welcomed back if we leave his poo to be gathered by shoes that may end up befouling the air during sacrament meeting). The game was further delayed by the flying of the helicopter. Said delays caused more of the aforementioned timeoutable Henry behaviors. So that was lovely. While dealing with such a meltdown, I heard yelling about the helicopter. I turned and saw it flying over the roof of the villa.

"Not over the roof," I yelled. Mistake. You see, my Madeline, controlling the chopper at that moment, is a freezer. Upon hearing my yell, she did not correct. No. She froze. She let go of the controls, which causes the helicopter to descend, which it did, right onto the inaccessible rooftop. There followed all manner of recrimination, brief climbing attempts, and senseless jumping.

During all of this, Lucky-who-was-off-his-leash (and we) discovered that he fits through the rails of the villa's front gate. And he made a run for it. We had never really tested whether he would reliably return to us and I wasn't really excited for this to be the moment. Madeline screamed for him.

"Maddie, go get the treats and run after him," I suggested. You see, my Madeline is a freezer. It required several moments of looking blankly from me to the vanishing dog for her to rally. But rally she did! Once she found the treats and ran into the road and discovered that she could not see Lucky, it was too late (for her, not the dog). The panic was too much and she succumbed.

Skipping much detail, I found Lucky a few moments later as he reliably came running to the distinctive sound of his treat bag opening. We were all feeling quite tense, however, and accusations (along with fists) were flying. I warned and then punished. No more tee ball at the villa. No wadi. And no home either (because Katie was getting a much deserved rest). So we sat in the car for 20 glorious minutes of weeping and wailing.

It was a great Saturday. Can't wait to do it again next week.

And guess what is sitting on the step outside the villa as I type this? A little baggie of Lucky poop.

Dogging It

Honeymoon phase is over. I have a (bleep) dog! Don't get me wrong, he's a sweet heart, and Henry's on-and-off girlfriend now has the vampire love marks on her arm to prove it. Nothing says, "Trust me with your children for a play date" quite like a biting dog.

Professional help has been summoned. The whisperers are coming next week for an interview... of the dog, not the owners. I am clearly not a real pet person, because this concept of interviewing the dog means nothing to me. I can't even imagine what a pet person might imagine this could possibly mean.

I think, overall, Lucky is a good dog. He just goes into John Rambo mode (in "First Blood", not the later sucky movies) sometimes in unpredictable ways. I want to go all Brian Dennehy on his little terrier derriere, but Katie is calling in Richard Crenna, so we'll see how that goes.

Meanwhile, Henry is in a pitched battle with the dog for lowest spot on the totem pole. Nothing makes a fight more bitter than really low stakes (see also, rivalries in academia for the right to publish on esoteric topics that will be read by exactly four people ever).

Being Young Ain't What It Used to Be

Being young feels older than it did 10 years ago.

I have more sadness about losing my hair than I thought I would.  I always told myself that if I were to lose my hair, I would just let it go.  Now I yell for everyone to quiet down when the Rogain add comes on.  The real problem is that I am losing it in such a way that there is no graceful adjustment period.

And I have to stretch before I exercise.  What's that all about?  And after hiking in the Wadi, as we did this morning with Lucky, my knees are killing me.

The Wadi

My back hurts.

My high school friends are posting wedding photos on Facebook...their kids' weddings.

Watching a classic Christmas movie with the kids a few weeks ago, I fielded this devastating question: Dad, why does the phone have that string attached to it?

Now I Have a Dog _AND_ a Wife

Marriage is great. You give up some things but gain others. On the one hand you give up control of your time and money. On the other hand you gain someone pointing out all your mistakes. So you take the good with the bad.

We got a dog a little over a week ago. Now I also have a dog pointing out all my parenting mistakes. Turns out, he's super effective at it because he reveals the errors. Can't reward bad behavior in a dog. Crate training. Can't let him out of the crate until he stops whining, never when he begins whining. Then, Maddie complains about such-and-such, I don't want to deal with it, so I tell her to go grab some Pringles, knowing this will bring me peace. See how I did that?

Lucky the Dog. Best parenting manual I've encountered so far.

Not only that, but my house is super clean since getting a dog. Kids don't want to leave anything out for him to chew on and we've learned that it's easier to quickly clear the table and rinse the dishes than it is to train him to stay off the table. He enforces discipline.

Not only that, but we are walking around the neighborhood a lot more now that we have a dog, which is good exercise and good to finally see what's around the corner.


On the other hand, he goes bonko for about 15 minutes every night around bed time, snarling and sprinting, and trying to chew on every imaginable thing. So we're working on that.

The Thing That Happened While Riding Horses

We went horseback riding with friends the weekend before Christmas.  I had been to the pyramids already with Caleb for a class field trip but, shamefully after 6 months in Egypt, this was the first time taking the whole family.  We followed our friends who had invited us to ride horses with them and I was surprised when, almost at the pyramids, they took an unfamiliar turn south, away from the pyramids (away from the Giza ones anyway).

We followed one of the many Nile canals (when I say canal, what you should think of is the trash compactor from Star Wars) and followed it until arriving at some lovely stables between the Sakkara and Giza pyramids.

At length, everyone was on a horse and riding through the sand.  Given that there were many novice riders, the professional guide-to-horse ratio was low.  Early on, Katie's horse tangled with Hilary's horse (Hilary is Maddie's friend and daughter of friends who invited us for the ride) and a double de-horsing was narrowly avoided.  But all calmed down and we enjoyed a sand blown ride through the desert.

The horses, some of them less trained and fit than others, tired as we neared the end, however.  We were all quite spread out by then when I heard a commotion from Caleb's and Henry's horses.  I turned in time to see a buck, causing separation of hands from reign, then a shimmy, sending the loosened Caleb careening face first off his six-foot perch.

His face broke his fall, so that was good.  I guess the other good thing is that it happened in the desert, the sand making for a reasonably soft landing.  I, a novice rider myself, struggled to get my horse to stop as I yelled after his welfare.  He bounced up fast, but did not speak.  I believe he had his wind knocked out.  Meanwhile, Henry's horse, seeing the confusion, chose the moment to lay down and attempt to roll over on top of Henry.  Fortunately, he is short and his legs were not stuck under the horse.  He scampered away without incident.

By now I was off my horse and approaching Caleb who, but for spitting out a mouthful of sand, appeared uninjured.  Katie, who had been a quarter mile ahead, was running toward us.  I am very proud to report that she was yelling, "Get back on that horse!"  No quitters allowed in Katie-land.  I like it.

And to their credit, both Caleb and Henry, free of harm, were eager to get back on the horse.  Caleb even subsequently decided he wanted to take riding lessons, the perfect response to being thrown, in my humble opinion.

Indulgent Christmas Home Movie (in which I experiment with iMovie tricks!)

Maddie Sings Hanukkah Song at Mormon Christmas Party in Egypt

Yes, I realize I should buy a better pair of jeans, but please, this should be about Maddie...and a little bit about Henry's stage presence.